Wednesday, August 10, 2011

things i never thought i'd say until i became a mother

we all have it.  the list of things we never thought would come out of our mouths.  things that were so far fetched that there was no way we'd ever say.  yep.  you know you have one too.  here's mine:

hold on a second, i have to flush your poop.

get your finger out of my nose.

don't hit the cat with the light saber.

no, you cannot have my sniper rifle.  your revolver is right there, use that. (nerf)

the fish do not eat peanut butter!

do we need to change the butt?

poo-splosion!!!!

put that back please (ok, yes, i would probably say that anyway, just not EIGHTY BAJILLION TIMES)

once upon a time, there was a mom, her name was missus taranadon......

that was not nice.  say i'm sorry to the kitty!

get your butt out of my face please.

you already have shoes on.  

why are you licking my leg?

and my personal favorite.....

DON'T TOUCH THE POOP!!!!


9 comments:

  1. Oh yes, I have some as well:

    "Don't eat my necklace."

    "Um. Where is your diaper?"

    "Your head is NOT a weapon!" He loves headbutts! Why?!?

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  2. oh yes, the headbutts!!! what is the fascination????

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  3. I think my personal favorite is telling my 5 year old to "get your fork out of your nose and eat your peas".

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  4. "Do not rub that on the wall!!!"

    "Do not rub that on your sister!!!"

    "Do not rub that on the cat!!!"

    Poop, boogers, peanut butter.... *sigh*

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  5. Hahahaha!!! Love the list and the comments! :D

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  6. 'what's this'
    'turkey. eat it'
    'no. i want chicken'
    'ok, it's chicken. eat it'
    'yum!' (then 3 yr old eats all)

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  7. you may NOT have a chainsaw

    why is there a cobra (plastic) in the bathtub

    Sorry, I have no idea if there's a world record for the longest fart.

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  8. I have definitely said "Don't hit the dog with the light saber." Recently.

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  9. How about "Hitting includes headbutting" or "headbutting IS hitting"? I say this to AJ all the time.

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